Monday, April 5, 2010
“Derrida: Fear of Writing”
In Derrida’s fear of writing, Derrida says “I’m not afraid when I’m writing but I’m afraid when I dream about what I wrote.” I think that as soon as you start writing, even if it is under your real name, you start to function as somebody slightly different, as a “writer”. You establish from yourself to yourself continuities and a level of logic which is not quite the same as your real life. All this ends up constituting a kind of neo-identity which is not identical to whom you really are, this is what motivates his fear. I think he was scared about people thinking badly about who Derrida really is. For me the fear in writing comes when I have the idea, I know just exactly what I want to say and the angle at which I want to present it, at this point it’s a thing not any words, an object of thought, but the fear comes when I have to choose the words to portray the mental substance and it doesn’t announce itself right away perfectly, that’s when I feel the fear about writing.
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I experience the same fear in writing as you. I don't care so much about what other people think but I feel overwhelmed trying to find the perfect words to describe my thoughts. Many times I struggle with my choice of words and then the idea you want to show isn't there at all. Words can be so powerful that sometimes it directs the reader from what you want to say to something totally different. That's why I think it is so nerve-wracking!
ReplyDeleteOften, when I sit down to write, a wealth of ideas stream into my unconscious. Then, I am forced to translate my thoughts into a form easily interpreted by others by using my consciousness. However, this is often challenging. I mean to say one thing, but what comes out is completely different, though it may also be true. Sometimes what I desire to say is so complex it is difficult to express. It is frightening to think that what one wishes to say is not expressible by language, for else is it possible for one to convey their ideas? If one cannot explain how they feel, it will remain unknown. In some ways that thought is more startling than being unable to express yourself.
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